April Is Military Child Month....

I decided to blog an open letter to my special Military children! 

My Handsome Brilliant Military Brats, 

     You have been asked to sacrifice so much in your little lives. At this point in time, you don't have the knowledge to grasp the gravity of those sacrifices! You both (soon to be three of you) have been born into this life. It's all you know! Yet, it isn't easy just because it's been all you've known. We're coming up on our second PCS (Permanent Change of Station) as a family. We have remained in one place for quite awhile. Five years to be exact. Two of you will be born in at this current station. We've gone through so many life changes besides the ups and downs of military life. Mommy had cancer and that disrupted two years of our lives! Two very crazy years in which you all bounced from place to place with not much stability in between. Not to mention all the emotions that come with that. You all were very young when the roughest part of our lives happened but again, doesn't mean it was easy. You've been brought into this family without choice. God blessed our marriage with three healthy children. Three children who didn't choose their parents or the life their parents have chosen to live. As parents we did take time to consider the option of bringing children into this hectic military life style. We weighed whether it was smart, whether you all could handle it, whether we as parents could handle it. The answer came when God spoke to our hearts and said we weren't to prevent children from coming into our marriage. I also took Matthew 6:25-34 to heart. "Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself...." We knew that if God blessed us with children then it was meant to be. We believe in our hearts that this is the life God wants us to live currently. We take it day by day.  Rather station by station, transfer by transfer. This upcoming PCS will probably be the first that you will actually remember. The first of many!  We happen to be going to a place where you all are familiar with and excited about. Yet that hasn't stopped the sadness of leaving behind the life you've known for so long. We know this isn't your conviction and life you've chosen to live.  Yet we ask it of you! More, demand it of you! As an adult Daddy chose to sign up to serve his country! And as a wife, Mommy chose to marry and get on board with this life style as well. There's been no choice for you! You deserve much more recognition than you'll ever receive. You will be asked to be without your Daddy more times than most of your peers. You will be asked to move from state to state sometimes, without much notice. With everything you've been asked to sacrifice please know this. We love you! You're more than a blessing to our family. No matter how often Daddy is gone, or how frequently you have to say good-bye to friends, know that you are strong. You are learning so many life skills that most children will never learn. And yes, it won't be easy but believe that there will be benefits. For one, you get to help our country be protected! You get to have a Daddy who helps others. You get to have parents who serve Christ no matter the sacrifices. These sacrifices, you are being made to make, will bless your hearts and minds. Even though you don't know it right now, I promise that it will! I also promise to always support you when you may not have the words to express how difficult and challenging things are. I will love you even when you don't love me or this life we live. Above all, always know that God is there for you! When everything in your life is chaotic and you don't understand or you're angry, God will always be there to listen. HE is ever present in your hearts and minds. HE never moves. He never goes to sea for months at a time. HE is always patient, loving and kind. So my dear sons, as you grow in this life, please know that Mommy and Daddy love you! We respect and admire the fact that you're living a life you didn't choose! Also know that God is there all the time. And HE will never fade!  You are amazing, resilient and blessed. Always remember that! Thank you for the constant sacrifice you make! 

Much Love! 

Your Mother

Scars

I decided to finally blog about something that's been on my heart and mind for awhile now. Scars. I have so many physical scars. There's stretch marks, gall bladder scars, port scar, c-section, heck! I even have scars at the back of my throat from my tonsils. I definitely have a flawed body. Even at my most self conscious though, scars have never bothered me. My port was more sensitive only because, uh, cancer! Nothing I ever predicted going through and a scar for something that last a week and caused me much pain. Like, literally, pain. But it didn't take me long to get over having that scar. I see and hear about products or even just oils or vitamins that you can put on your scars to heal them so you have clear skin. I just find myself not interested. I think maybe my port scar took a bit longer to get over because people can see it. Unless I wear a turtle neck, it's always visible. I can hide all my other ones. So after thinking about it, I started to wonder WHY it doesn't bother me.  So much does about my physical appearance so you'd assume that scars were automatically one of them. I got my first stretch mark around 13 years old. Puberty kinda happens fast and sudden. haha! After thinking about it, I realize I'm actually proud of my scars. Every one represents something. Yeah sure, most of them aren't fun times. My c-section scar and belly stretch marks are easy to love. Because they brought life. I feel so honored and grateful to even have those scars. I know so many women who haven't experienced pregnancy and want to. I know so many women who've struggled to bring life into the world period. God chose me! He chose me to carry 3 lives and bring 3 lives (even if not my planned way) into this world safely! (well, we're still working on the 3rd, but we're close! haha) What an honor! And a blessing! Oh sure! I totally could've rubbed lotion/creams on my belly all pregnancy to prevent the marks, but I just had zero desire. I found my heart desiring to see those physical imperfections. Every single time I look at them, they bring nothing but good memories for me. There are other scars that bring bad memories. For example the suffering with my gall bladder. My goodness. Awful. Awful awful awful! So much pain. So much time away from my newborn first born child. So many trips to the hospital. My first ambulance ride which was very scary to do alone. Just not good feelings associated with my gall bladder. However, once it was out, oh man! Bliss! I felt 100% better immediately! Yet theses scars that are from pain, don't bother me one bit either. Again, I think I struggled a bit with my port scar because my port was literally in there a week and it caused lots of pain for me as well. However, I still don't have an issue with those scars. Why? Because I went through them! I like the reminder that I'm stronger than I ever imagined! To me, even for the "bad scars" its a blessing. God chose me to have these struggles. He chose me to go through cancer. Over the years you start to learn small reasons why God allowed you those struggles. I know I've been able to help so many friends out with cancer or gall bladder issues. I've been able to advise them! It's been a blessing to me, honestly. God allowed theses scars to happen and they make me feel loved by HIM. Then there's silly scars like my belly button ring scar. haha It just makes me laugh. I love piercings. Always have. I've always gotten them for myself. But I was also young, unwise and poor. So I paid some guy to pierce my belly button. It took FOREVER to heal and heal it did. Literally, as it healed it pushed my ring out. The entire thing healed up. hahahaha! That's what happens when you do things and you're broke. The guy who pierced me, pierced it too shallow. So I had a belly button ring for all of 6-8 months. And it left a pretty nasty scar. It just makes me giggle how much youth plays a roll in your life. All of the scraped knees and bruised elbows during childhood, and a belly button ring is how I get a scar! The shortly after that I sliced my thumb open on a tuna can! First one in my family to earn stitches! I was an ADULT! 6 stitches folks! Yup. Things like that just make me giggle! So the long and short of this, is a plea to all of you ladies who are self conscious about your scars! Please don't spend money trying to get rid of what journey God has blessed you with! Be proud! Good, bad, stupid, it doesn't matter. It's all a part of your story! It makes you who you are. And even if you get rid of them or prevent them, it's still your journey! Accept it! Embrace it! Love yourself! All of yourself!